The Cookie Meltdown
Oh yes. I was in an amateur short film this summer, only just released: Reginald Smith: The Cookie Meltdown. Very silly zero-budget affair, but a vehicle for the lot of us to hone our filmmaking skills. I think it came out very well for our first try together.
Also, the title graphics were done in part using Inkscape. Full circle, man. Full circle.
I showed it to my parents tonight and they were very complimentary, especially given its experimental nature. I was not, however, prepared for this:
mental-mom: I thought you said you had a part in the movie?
mental: Mom, I play a major character!
mental-mom: Oh … could you, um, rewind to that part then?
mental: Okay…
mental rewinds
mental: See, this part.
mental-mom hesitates. A long, uncomfortable hesitation.
mental-mom: Which … one is you?
mental points.
mental: That one. Me. There. I’m speaking also.
mental-mom: ...that’s you? It doesn’t even sound like you!
mental does the character’s voice.
mental-mom: Seriously, that’s you?
mental: Yeah, look, I’ve got a close-up coming up.
mental-mom: Um, pause it?
mental obliges.
mental-mom: That is? Oh wow.
mental-mom: You shaved, and your face… just the expression… you look so different...
mental: I’m in character. It’s called acting.
mental looks at mental-mom.
mental-mom looks at mental.
There’s a simultaneous outburst of nervous laughter.
mental: My own mother doesn’t recognize me!
mental-mom: Omigosh… Omigosh, I’m so sorry… I really didn’t…
mental: No, no, that’s fine. Great even. It means I succeeded!
mental-mom: I think you might be the best actor in the film.
mental: Well, you know, a few years back I did get really into reading up on method acting and practicing. I guess it paid off.
mental-mom: So, it’s just the four of you and the stuffed bears in the movie?
mental: Yeah. Er, bears? Plural?
mental-mom: There’s … what?
mental: We only used one bear.
mental-mom: One bear?
mental: Yes. Two roles, one bear.
mental-mom: Oh.
A beat.
mental: The bear is also a good actor.
We both tumble into paroxysms of laughter.
True story.
So I think I shall leave it to you to figure out which character I play; use the comments form to guess, if you like.
John has agreed not to use my real name online, so those of you who know it but haven’t met me might still have to guess a bit…